Life just flies by...

It is my mom's birthday today and I think it will be a hard one for her. You see it is her 57th Birthday. That age is significant in our lives. My grandma was one of the most unique, bluntly out-spoken, caring, genuine, family and community minded people that I have ever known. Her life was taken away from us in a year long, devastating death death due to pancreatic cancer. I remember the day she died. I sat on the curb in the small hometown I grew up in with my mother on one side and my aunt on the other. We cried and we laughed. We were so sad and yet we were so happy that she didn't face another day of such pain and agony. She didn't know me that day, and I so hate that. I went on a 3 day school trip and when I returned she died. I remember her sister slowly pushing her eyelids shut and it was over. As we sat on the curb, we watched as the funeral home wheeled her out covered with a velvet blue cloth and strapped to the gurney. I can hear the sounds and relive the feelings. You see it was the end of a lot for our family. Things were never the same. It was 20 years ago this summer. My mom was the same age I am now and my grandmother was 57. Today is July 21, 2007 and it is now my mother's 57th birthday. I can't imagine losing my mother that young. I think of all we have done in the years since her death . I have some regrets but, oh she would have loved the grand kids and now great grand kids that she never met. I probably won't give my parents a grandchild. Sometimes that makes me sad. When it makes me the saddest is when I realize how much they love me and how much my grandparents loved me. Life just flies by...